5 Things You Should Never Say to Someone Going Through a Divorce

Going through a divorce can be challenging. Those experiencing this difficult situation are experiencing many emotions and often scrambling to work out the details of their new life after divorce. In addition to a shoulder to lean (or cry) on, those in the midst of a divorce need words of encouragement. With that in mind, there are some things that should never be said.

Divorce and parenting coach Rosalind Sedacca said one thing you should stay away from is speaking badly about someone’s soon-to-be ex. “Making disparaging statements about the soon-to-be ex is a big mistake. Regardless how you may feel about the ex, it’s not your place to discuss their behavior or personality traits. Divorces are far more complex than outsiders can imagine, and it’s none of your business. Some relationships don’t move ahead to divorce, which can be awkward for you in the future,” It is also advisable to stay silent on how easy or hard you thought the divorce process was. Only the people actually involved in the divorce can say how they felt while going through this life event. Counselor Joanne Dennison told The Cheat Sheet she felt hurt when someone said she should be thankful for the ease of her divorce: One of the most painful things said to me was ‘at least you have an easy divorce.’ Granted, this person had apparently had one with every bad thing you can hear of, but for me it was like a dagger in the heart. All divorces are painful even when they are the ‘right’ thing. It also happened to be just as I was signing the papers to lose my home of 18 years. I think anytime someone assumes they understand the whole situation, and says something, it is almost always going to be wrong and hurt someone. Words can be healing but can also wound like a knife, so think carefully before you speak. Here are five things you should never say to someone going through a divorce.  Read more